Back to School

It's that time of year again. After a summer of lazy days and relaxed routines, its time to get the kids back in the saddle. I thought I'd post a few ideas to help parents remember to apply DISC to make that back to school routine flow a little more easily.

Remember your D child needs to feel in control. Give him a set of choices from which to choose, all acceptable to you. For example: In the morning... "Do you want to take your lunch today or buy it?" or "Do you want to wear the red shirt or the blue one?" or "Scrambled or fried?" After school..."I don't care when you do your homework, just so it's finished by dinnertime." When you talk to him about his day, ask about interaction with others. Chances are any problems that crop up will be in the human interface department. "Do you understand why you hurt Billy's feelings when you said that?" or "How do you think Suzie felt when you took that toy from her?" You know the issues, you've been there before. Also, remind him that the teacher is in charge of the classroom and that he is only in charge of himself.

For your I child it is mainly about helping him to learn the self discipline that is necessary to succeed in any educational environment. Writing down assignments is a must! Even our youngest children have homework these days, so start early teaching your I to keep a planner or notebook with everything he needs to have ready the next day. Train him to look over it before leaving school to ensure he brings home the books he will need. Remember, he's not the greatest at working autonomously, so you may need to sit along side him while he does homework or at the very least be in the general area. I have my child with this personality type do homework at the kitchen table while I'm cooking dinner. I'm available to answer any questions, but also can keep him on task when he starts flying his pencil around like an airplane. Remember to use positive statements to motivate an I child: "After you get your homework done let's go for a bike ride!" or "Let's finish up homework before dinner so that we can play a board game after we eat."

For the S child, remember to wake her a little earlier than the rest. She needs more time to ease into her day. Whenever possible, pull her up onto your lap and spend a few minutes snuggling before you throw her into the morning routine. She doesn't hurry, so she'll need more time to eat and get dressed. She's not likely to ask questions at school for fear of drawing attention to herself, so go over her homework with her to make sure she understands the concepts. Again, she will work better in groups than alone, so if you can, sit with her while she does homework or have her do it the same time her sibling does. Also, very important... know who your S child's friends are. They are followers. Even if they know something isn't right, it's so much harder for them to speak up than any of the other personality types. You can influence their choices in the friend department and you need to.

And your C child is probably in heaven. The routine of school is right up her alley. You probably won't even have to nag her to do her homework. Let her load her backpack and lay out her clothes the night before. Tell her the schedule for the day, for example, "You've got gym class today and for lunch they're serving spaghetti. After school we're taking your brother to soccer practice. We'll be home by dinner time and you can do your homework then." It seems so simple, but her anxiety level will be greatly reduced and she'll be more calm and cooperative. Remember, she probably has unrealistically high expectations for herself; help her to enjoy the journey. We don't always have to get straight A's and sometimes it's okay to color outside the lines.

Happy parenting and have a great school year!